Be Your Own Hero
“One day you will look back and see; that all along you were blooming.”|Morgan Harper Nichols
Lately, I’ve been touched by a lot of women who by sharing their truth not only encourages me to share mine but also is a great reminder that when we show our vulnerability, scars, and truth it draws others to us. We all struggle most days to stay positive, push through our fears and insecurities. What connects us is the fact we’re human and just want to feel love and understanding.
What’s been amazing to me is that you can find love from even the smallest things. A song that touches your heart, a caring thought expressed by a friend, a passage in a book that you swear was written for you. You have to have an open heart and be willing to look for those inspirations. Sometimes we can get so caught up in what we don’t have that we take for granted the blessings and need to practice more gratitude.
I just finished Rachel Hollis’s “Girl, Stop Apologizing”, and what I truly enjoyed most was this successful women’s honesty in sharing her weaknesses and struggles in her journey. So many of us only see the end product of success and don’t see all the failures, mistakes and struggles it took to get there. As a perfectionist myself, I’ve always been afraid of failure and will sometimes procrastinate because I want the end product to be my very best. What I’ve realized over the years is that if you give your best that’s enough. It might not be enough for someone else, and yes it might involve a few mistakes, but it needs to be enough for you. End each day knowing no matter what you did it was your best and feel proud of that.
My best friend sent me a song the other day that has become my anthem I sing over and over again as a reminder we all have a choice to become stronger and better, little by little each day. In “Castles”, miss Freya Ridings states the powerful message, “I’m gonna build castles from the rubble of your love, I’m gonna be more than you ever thought I was“. No other person should have the power to control your happiness. While we all have circumstances in our lives, we might wish were better, we do have a choice each day to make the best of our situation and look for the light and lessons.
Through my years with therapists and self-help books the main underlying truth is that we cannot control how others act, but we can choose to control how we respond and if we give them power or not. Selena Gomez just put out a super powerful song called “Lose you to love me”, which has a lot of truth in the fact that sometimes we have to walk away from those who don’t love us how we deserve. Yes, love takes hard work, patience, endurance, time, but it’s also given, it shouldn’t hurt us, so if someone isn’t treating you with the respect you deserve its better to walk away. Whether romantic relationships, friendships, jobs, even family, if they aren’t filling you up and helping you be a better person, it’s alright to chose to not give them your precious time. In this rough world we live in sometimes we experience things we don’t’ deserve, but if we never share our truth and voice our lessons we can’t heal or possibly help someone else in their hard road.
As a mother, that’s one of my biggest goals is to teach my daughter to listen to her inner voice, remember you deserve to be honored and don’t always take the easier route. Yes, it’s scary to be vulnerable, to love wholeheartedly, take risks, but in the end, don’t live a life filled with regrets with what might have been. Believe in who you are, know your enough and every day show up and work hard for who you want to be. Take a lesson from the sunflower, chose to look up to the light and focus on the positive, it’s the best way to live.